April 23, 2012

Hail Samhain?

Buon giorno. It's time for a spot of fun. I'm going to speculate and play with words.

"What's with the Samhain, boss? We're nowhere near Halloween."

Because it's not actually a Halloween post, Ernie. Hey, where's Nicky?

"Him and Lela went to see that guy about that thing you told them to."

Oh, right.

Annotated screenshot of a Google map. Click for larger.
Quite a few people don't know that "Samhain" is not the name of the guy in the billiards parlor. It's an important occultists' holiday (witches, druids, Satanists and that sort of thing), and is most commonly pronounced SOW-en. Here, pig pig pig! Another pronunciation is so (long "O", as in "So what?") -WEEN. Best wishes with those.

The city in the map is Halesowen. It also has an odd pronunciation, sounds like "Hail Zowen". Blending the Celtic pronunciations on Samhain to get SO-wen, and you can get "Hail, Samhain" out of it. Hail Satan. Which is fitting, since it's not all that far from Druid's Heath.

I can easily picture a drunken narcissistic Brit atheist mumbling "Hail SO-wen" as he tries to find an Internet connection so he can spew his bile for his dozen adoring but mindless fans. (Another of my speculations is that atheism is another form of Satanism, so it's fitting for him to say, "Hail Samhain", speech slurred by cheap rum.) If he cannot find a Wi-Fi hotspot, he begs people for a place to recharge his Mac and to access the Internet. This does not last long, as nobody can stand him for more than a few hours.

You see, he lives in his auto because after being evicted from several flats in a short span of time, nobody wants to rent to him. That, and because he is unemployable due to outbursts of extreme rage. Would you hire or rent to someone like that?  He's high-risk for your reputation. And for your safety, capice?

Don't let hate destroy your thinking, kids.

Addendum: I've long said that this kind of atheist has no sense of humour, unless s/he is mocking Christians, God, Jesus, the Bible and so on. But like I keep saying, I think that atheism causes brain damage. Case in point: It's reported to me that someone took exception to my story here. Worse, this guy claimed that it was about himself.  Again. (In a previous post, I talked about someone who was left nameless. Then, he and his wife came along and identified themselves in the then-existing comments!) This is the intellectual elite? Not bloody likely.

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